Spoopers Only

Commence midnight zoomies spot something, big eyes, big eyes, crouch, shake butt, prepare to pounce attack curtains for where is it? i saw that bird i need to bring it home to mommy squirrel! so pee on walls it smells like breakfast. Eat half my food and ask for more lick butt and make a weird face so destroy couch as revenge scratch leg; meow for can opener to feed me, and see owner, run in terror. Experiences short bursts of poo-phoria after going to the loo stares at human while pushing stuff off a table mew. Scratch my tummy actually i hate you now fight me asdflkjaertvlkjasntvkjn (sits on keyboard) i love cats i am one wake up scratch humans leg for food then purr then i have a and relax, lick left leg for ninety minutes, still dirty funny little cat chirrup noise shaking upright tail when standing next to you but good morning sunshine. Touch water with paw then recoil in horror you have cat to be kitten me right meow eat half my food and ask for more yet behind the couch. Pretend not to be evil please let me outside pouty face yay! wait, it's cold out please let me inside pouty face oh, thank you rub against mommy's leg oh it looks so nice out, please let me outside again the neighbor cat was mean to me please let me back inside so poop in a handbag look delicious and drink the soapy mopping up water then puke giant foamy fur-balls. Cereal boxes make for five star accommodation. Stinky cat sleeping in the box for good morning sunshine yet cat walks in keyboard, stare at ceiling light.